Jerry Stiller

I shave without using shaving cream.

We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there’s a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together.

I ask myself why I do it. Maybe it’s to prove I’m still around. It takes a lot out of my body. I’m not an NBA player anymore. At my age, very few people can handle it.

The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent.

It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there’s a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures.

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way.

Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field.

I loved the idea of touching base with an audience.

My father and mother – I figured if I could make them laugh, they’d stop fighting. I stole all their material.

Anne is very forgiving. She doesn’t care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued about finances.

Money is sensual.

During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.

Some of the routines come back very easily. We do it off the top of our heads.

I’ve been around the block a lot and I’ve had a merry trail for 55 years.

I don’t think my judgment is that good. I don’t know what is funny.

Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made the movie.

Anne hated the idea of putting me down in front of the audience.

Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer’s.