The Lord gave us two ends – one to sit on and the other to think with. Success depends on which one we use the most.

The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet.

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other.

If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you’ll be married to a man who cheats on his wife.

Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies.

Sensual pleasures have the fleeting brilliance of a comet; a happy marriage has the tranquillity of a lovely sunset.

All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest – never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership.

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim.

I don’t believe that you have to be a cow to know what milk is.

If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things that are missing. If you don’t have love in your life, no matter what else there is, it’s not enough.

Maturity: Be able to stick with a job until it is finished. Be able to bear an injustice without having to get even. Be able to carry money without spending it. Do your duty without being supervised.

No one has the right to destroy another person’s belief by demanding empirical evidence.

Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and repeat to yourself, the most comforting words of all; this, too, shall pass.

Class is the sure-footedness that comes with having proved you can meet life.

Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closes friends; if they seem OK, then you’re the one.

You need that guy like a giraffe needs strep throat.

People who care about each other enjoy doing things for one another. They don’t consider it servitude.

Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.

At every party there are two kinds of people – those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.

Know yourself. Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don’t recognize them.

Know when to tune out, if you listen to too much advice you may wind up making other peoples mistakes.

Too many people today know the price of everything and the value of nothing.

I advise keeping four feet on the floor and all hands on deck.

The Lord gave us two ends – one to sit on and the other to think with. Success depends on which one we use the most.

The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.

Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good.

There could be no honor in a sure success, but much might be wrested from a sure defeat.

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.