I was darkly convinced that at age 52 I would kill myself because my mother committed suicide at that age. I was fantasizing that she was waiting for me on the other side of the grave.
Meaning of the quote
The quote suggests that Spalding Gray, an American actor, believed he would take his own life when he turned 52 years old. This belief came from the fact that his mother had died by suicide at that same age. He even imagined that his mother was waiting for him on the other side of death, as if she had planned their reunion.
About Spalding Gray
Spalding Gray was an American actor, novelist, playwright, screenwriter, and performance artist known for his autobiographical monologues that were later adapted into films. He achieved renown for works like “Swimming to Cambodia” and “Gray’s Anatomy”, but tragically passed away by suicide at the age of 62 after struggling with depression and injuries from a car accident.
More quotes from Spalding Gray
I think of New York as a puree and the rest of the United States as vegetable soup.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
I say that I can’t make anything up. I think of myself as a collage artist. I’m cutting and pasting memories of my life. And I say, I have to live a life in order to tell a life. I would prefer to tell it because telling you’re always in control, you’re like God.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
If I can make people laugh it’s like being a good lover.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
I knew I couldn’t live in America and I wasn’t ready to move to Europe so I moved to an island off the coast of America – New York City .
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
I was darkly convinced that at age 52 I would kill myself because my mother committed suicide at that age. I was fantasizing that she was waiting for me on the other side of the grave.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
I understood once I held a baby in my arms, why some people have the need to keep having them.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
The fact that New York continues in the face of all of the chaos, of the crime, of the madness, you just think that it would just pop and vanish, just explode.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
Everything is contingent, and there is also chaos.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
I fantasize about going back to high school with the knowledge I have now. I would shine. I would have a good time, I would have a girlfriend. I think that’s where a lot of my pain comes from. I think I never had any teenage years to go back to.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)
Skiing is better than sex actually, because for me a good round of sex might be seven minutes. Skiing you can do for seven hours.
actor, dramatist, playwright, screenwriter (1941-2004)