I don’t know, I never smoked AstroTurf.

I don’t know, I never smoked AstroTurf.

I have no trouble with the twelve inches between my elbow and my palm. It’s the seven inches between my ears that’s bent.

Kids should practice autographing baseballs. This is a skill that’s often overlooked in Little League.

Ninety percent I’ll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I’ll probably waste.