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Home
Authors
Bill Vaughan
American
Journalist
About the author
I'm an actor. And I guess I've done so many movies I've achieved some high visibility. But a star? I guess I still think of myself as kind of a worker ant.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Movies
#Actor
Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Life
#Draft
#Service
#Army
Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Will
#Study
#Research
#Money
#Happiness
Muscles come and go; flab lasts.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Now
#Baseball
#Business
#Women
#Scientists
It would be nice if the poor were to get even half of the money that is spent in studying them.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Poor
#Money
Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Work
#Day
#Man
#Space
If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income - which he then spends sending his son to college.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Man
#Education
#College
#Son
#Income
By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Time
#Years
#Old
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Old
#New year
#Midnight
A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Fun
#Being
#Old
A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Will
#Democracy
#Fight
#America
#Vote
#Ocean
In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Life
#Idea
#Trying
#Pressure
The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Youth
#Age
#Middle age
#New year
We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Hope
#Will
#World
#Gratitude
#Insects
To God, thy country, and thy friend be true.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#God
#Country
#Friend
The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Now
#World
#Home
The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Love
#People
#Poor
#Tax
The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Trees
#Names
People learn something every day, and a lot of times it's that what they learned the day before was wrong.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#People
#Day
#Wrong
The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does.
Bill Vaughan,
American
Journalist
#Vice