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Home
Authors
Jack Benny
American
Comedian
About the author
Gags die, humor doesn't.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Humor
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Golf
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Age
#Mind
I don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Want
It's not so much knowing when to speak, when to pause.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
Modesty is my best quality.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Quality
#Modesty
My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Wife
#Years
#Argument
#Murder
#Divorce
If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
#Mind
Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian
I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.
Jack Benny,
American
Comedian