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Home
Authors
Laurence J. Peter
Canadian
Writer
About the author
Democracy is a process by which people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#People
#Will
#Democracy
#Man
#Blame
A censor is an expert in cutting remarks. A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Will
#Man
A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Logic
#Ignorance
America is a country that doesn't know where it is going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Country
#America
America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#America
#Land
#Taxation
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Will
#Today
#Tomorrow
#Yesterday
An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
#Intelligence
As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes many an expression that isn't.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Expression
#Fact
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Time
#Past
#Bureaucracy
The great question is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with failure.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Failure
#Question
#Content
Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults, but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Faults
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Art
#Originality
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Parents
#Psychiatry
#Faults
Slump, and the world slumps with you. Push, and you push alone.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#World
Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Problems
Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Regret
#Speech
Men now monopolize the upper levels... depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Now
#Men
#Women
#Incompetence
The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Intelligence
#Leisure
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
#Poor
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Eye
#Truth
#Beauty
#Competence
The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls; the soldier details his wounds, the shepherd his sheep.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Sheep
#Wounds
Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees have to be appointed to do the work.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Work
When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Danger
#Doubt
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Work
#Employees
#Incompetence
You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Job
#Fool
You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water. Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Sea
#Wishes
#Water
Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#American
#Television
#Force
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Education
There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Rest
Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Will
#Reputation
Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Work
#Hell
#Bed
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Chance
#Will
#Being
#Opportunity
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Time
#Mother
#Nature
#Father
Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Incompetence
Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Man
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Patience
#Misfortune
#Fortune
It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Parents
#Heredity
If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Mind
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Right
#Wrongs
If you don't know where you're going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Will
#End
In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Incompetence
Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian than going to the garage makes you a car.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Car
#Christian
#Church
Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
Laurence J. Peter,
Canadian
Writer
#Miracles