The Good Quote
Open menu
Quotes
Authors
Topics
More
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
Home
Authors
Ron White
American
Comedian
About the author
I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Truth
You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Years
#First
#Jokes
There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Years
#Wrong
#Beer
#Diet
There have been times in my life that I've had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Life
#Years
#Vices
The next time you have a thought... let it go.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Time
#Thought
The hardest that I've laughed at a movie was probably Team America. I laughed 'til I thought I was just gonna throw up. I almost had to turn it off.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Thought
#America
People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#People
#Work
#Saying
Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Death
#Trying
#states
My goal is just to become a better comedian.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Goal
I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that's all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Right
#Ability
I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Traveling
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Life
#Party
#Lemons
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It's like anything else. It's a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Now
#Work
#Writer
#Exercise
Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Want
#Skin
Diamonds - that'll shut her up... for a minute!
Ron White,
American
Comedian
I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.
Ron White,
American
Comedian
#Today
#Tomorrow