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Home
Authors
Steve Martin
American
Comedian
About the author
I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was... an arctic wilderness.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Will
#Country
#Wilderness
I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Money
#Sex
I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Woman
#Hate
I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Nothing
#Pretty
I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Business
#Mistake
Love is a promise delivered already broken.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Love
#Promise
Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Architecture
#Dancing
#Music
#Talking
There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Woman
Well, excuuuuuse me!
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make art you're an idiot.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Art
#Entertainment
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Day
#Night
You know what your problem is, it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all of life's riddles are answered in the movies.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Life
#Movies
When your hobbies get in the way of your work - that's OK; but when your hobbies get in the way of themselves... well.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Work
#Hobbies
What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#People
#Art
#Comedy
The real joy is in constructing a sentence. But I see myself as an actor first because writing is what you do when you are ready and acting is what you do when someone else is ready.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Acting
#First
#Writing
#Actor
#Joy
Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Man
#Pretty
#Talking
#Sex
#Kissing
Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#May
#Pretty
#Comedy
#Business
Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Order
#Chaos
#Funny
An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might be.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Dignity
#Wrong
#Apology
#Gentleman
Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Word
Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town.
Steve Martin,
American
Comedian
#Love
#Woman